A keen observer might notice I changed the number of days to advance my meta-goal to 5 from 7. A keen observer might further notice it blank.
Today I did not make it to the gym, for I forgot to take shorts/clothing that would be appropriate. It turned out this was kind of a good thing as homeowners are getting back to their home soon and I must sweep and steam the drapes, as it were. Also, for meditation this morning I just sat up when I first awoke and focused on my breathing, but fell asleep after I'm estimating 5 minutes. No gold star today!
Getting better at my guitar transitions, and messing around with picking more. I've got my very own song in the works.
So that was today.
Being at the front-end of the redux, I've added a few goals:
Keep a daily journal- this will be different content than my blog, handwritten, and not posted
Keep a dream journal- I've got one that contains dream journaling from several different periods that I will continue to add to
Well, with an impromptu trip to Seattle and then the long Holiday weekend for Thanksgiving, it's been a while. But this effort is not lost, nor forgotten. I updated the "Current Goals" section above, adding the current alien album, taking off some things, etc. Tomorrow I'll officially be back on track!
You may have noticed, if you are privy to the information, that my birthday is fast approaching. I have a several-years-running tradition of spending my birthday alone, reflecting on the year that has passed and the year yet to come. I will be repeating this tradition this year. I am going to head down a forest road and find a private spot then just hang out by myself. I'll walk around, think, write, go over the previous year and get a good idea of where I want to go with the coming year. I will attempt to distill this experience into a tangible blog entry so that I may incorporate this, my new tool.
I am going to give smoking another go. I am so torn about it. On the one hand, I like it. On the other, I am afraid of cancer. In fact it plays into one of the contradictions I talked about in an earlier post. These contradictions will make their way to this blog tomorrow so that I may have a conscious sense of them as I go into my birthday reflection.
To any who missed my entries and feared I was straying, fear not. All shall soon be even better than before. With the combination of my coming birthday and an approaching new year, I am going to refocus my desires and renew my efforts at personal transformation.
Things got switched up a bit today. I picked up the guitar right after my morning meditation and played it for somewhere around 40 minutes. When I got back to the Sedona house after school and the gym, I decided I needed to put some more polish on my content for tomorrow's D&D session so I only went through the chords real quick and did a few rounds of the picking part I am practicing. Ya alliteration!
You may also notice the new layout! A simple change, and one I should have thought of earlier. As you can see, my current goals will now appear between my calendar and the most recent post.
I've had some moments of feeling stupid and foolish about the what I'm doing here. I've also had numerous criticisms run through my mind about the nature of my goals, the pacing, etc. A theme keeps coming to mind about the contradictions in my life, and while I won't be posting tomorrow I think I'll be ready to write it out Thursday, so that should be an interesting post.
Overall, I feel rather positive about what I'm doing. I am glad to be experiencing success in the goals I've retired and the progress I am making, specifically with the guitar and committing to regular exercise. The weight loss I've experienced so far is a nice encouragement as well, and I keep trying to think consciously about my nutrition and lifestyle. I will probably soon start to keep track of my daily calorie intake. Gotta watch those carbs with the veggie thing. ;)
Also, I haven't had a free moment to really search for a good way to capture video in order to start vlogging, so if anyone reading this has any tips/suggestions, I'd much appreciate them~
Thanks for visiting, catch you Thursday!
Hello friends. After some reflection today I think I may have some new retirees! I also came up with a few ideas for the Garden, so take a look. Got back to the gym today, it felt great. Despite the copious amounts of food consumed this weekend, I'm down to 207. I'm assuming, given my breaks in attendance, that this is largely due to cutting out all the soda and meat. Guitar is going quite well, especially after this weekend. Not only did I get some guidance but some inspiration to keep at it and a progressing understanding of what's going on musically. I have to say this has been my most overtly satisfying goal so far! That's why I bumped up my practice time and set some specific sub-goals to focus on.
META-GOAL PROGRESS
* - - - - - -
CURRENT GOALS Retirees highlighted!
Physical Health
Exercise 5 times a week.
No smoking.
Vegetarian/slightly pescatarian diet.
Vitamins daily.
Drink 2-3 liters of water daily.
30 minutes morning meditation
30 minutes afternoon/evening meditation.
Brush teeth every morning and night.
Behavioral
Stop being a dick to Mr. X. This person will not be identified so as to protect their privacy.
When angry or frustrated, become conscious of this and use focus and breath exercise to regain control.
Allow for more realistic amounts of free time to avoid another over-stressed blowout.
Social
Call a friend or family member every week whom I haven't talked to in a while.
Organization
Keep and follow a detailed schedule.
Keep a budget and balance all purchases.
Add to blog every evening.
Renaissance Man
Practice guitar 1.5 hours a day (No Weds)
Transition to real C chord
F chord
Picking riff with hammering and pull-offs
Listen to an alien album each week. (This week's is "The Velvet Underground and Nico" by the Velvet Underground and...uh...Nico)
Regular reading, mostly of "classics."
That's about it for now. When I get done I'm going to get my evening meditation in, then take my melatonin and read a bit before crashing. Hasta manana!
Had a great weekend with friends, and got some guitar tutoring to boot! This is as good a time as any to note that I won't count things such as this as a failure to follow my plan. Similarly, having to move things around for school or family or something is no big deal. As long as I don't fail due to laziness or a lack of self control or some such it's not violating my goals, or their central essence at least.
I am resetting the meta-goal progress and adding in some new goals.
This week's new goals:
Practice guitar 1.5 hours a day (No Weds)
Transition to real C chord
F chord
Picking riff with hammering and pull-offs
30 minutes afternoon/evening meditation
META GOAL PROGRESS
- - - - - - -
Physical Health
Exercise 5 times a week.
No smoking.
Vegetarian/slightly pescatarian diet.
Vitamins daily.
Drink 2-3 liters of water daily.
30 minutes meditation each morning.
Brush teeth every morning and night.
Behavioral
Stop being a dick to Mr. X. This person will not be identified so as to protect their privacy.
When angry or frustrated, become conscious of this and use focus and breath exercise to regain control.
Allow for more realistic amounts of free time to avoid another over-stressed blowout.
Social
Call a friend or family member every week whom I haven't talked to in a while.
Organization
Keep and follow a detailed schedule.
Keep a budget and balance all purchases.
Add to blog every evening.
Renaissance Man
Practice guitar 1 hour at least 5 times per week.
Listen to an alien album each week. (This week's is _______ by the Velvet Underground)
Well on the tail end of guitar practice last night I got a call and after my chat somehow forgot all about my poor blog. So this entry is for yesterday, the 11th. First, the goals:
META GOAL PROGRESS
* * - - - - -
Physical Health
Exercise 5 times a week.
No smoking.
Vegetarian/slightly pescatarian diet.
Vitamins daily.
Drink 2-3 liters of water daily.
30 minutes meditation each morning.
Brush teeth every morning and night.
Behavioral
Stop being a dick to Mr. X. This person will not be identified so as to protect their privacy.
When angry or frustrated, become conscious of this and use focus and breath exercise to regain control.
Allow for more realistic amounts of free time to avoid another over-stressed blowout.
Social
Call a friend or family member every week whom I haven't talked to in a while.
Organization
Keep and follow a detailed schedule.
Keep a budget and balance all purchases.
Add to blog every evening.
Renaissance Man
Practice guitar 1 hour at least 5 times per week.
Listen to an alien album each week. (This week's is Pornography by The Cure)
Regular reading, mostly of "classics."
One-Off
Clean out closet, donating to clothing drive what I may, taking what else I can to Goodwill, and getting rid of the crap. (TUESDAY)
See adviser in order to unlock registration. (THURSDAY)
Apply for Spanish immersion program next semester. (THURSDAY)
Rather normal day, other than the fact that the water was shut off Tuesday. So, first thing in the morning I swung by and paid for service to be returned. Guitar is going really well, I am getting better at switching between the different chords and am enjoying it quite a bit. I find myself picking it up often to mess around for a few minutes beyond just the hour I have scheduled. In other news, I have added the Goal Garden! This is for ideas that have come to me for future goals that I don't want to forget. Check it out, and feel free to comment! I'm also thinking I might pilot using a poll to let the readers decide on new goals for the period from a few choices. Mmmmmm, interactivity!
Also, advance warning: I've got friends visiting this weekend. I will try to get an entry done Friday before they arrive but that may not work out, and I'm not sure how long they're staying so Saturday might not appear til Sunday morning.
Ah! I almost forgot, I can't see an advisor today because it's a holiday, duh. I will try to get in tomorrow morning before class.
However, applying for the Spanish program is online so I'll be doing it right after this! Hasta manana!
Argh housesitting! It's worth it overall.... I mean it got me a web cam and the netbook I am making tonight's entry on. Anyway, I am making some adjustments so as to not be held back on my meta-goal. Also, I realized earlier I have more ready to be retired!!! Woowoo!
META-GOAL PROGRESS
* - - - - - -
CURRENT GOALS New retires are highlighted! Physical Health
Exercise 5 times a week.
No smoking.
Vegetarian/slightly pescatarian diet.
No more than three coffees per day
No more than one soda per day. (FYI I have been lumping all sugary drinks, redbull, etc. in this category)
Vitamins daily.
Drink 2-3 liters of water daily.
7 hours of sleep nightly.
30 minutes meditation each morning.
Brush teeth every morning and night.
Behavioral
Stop being a dick to Mr. X. This person will not be identified so as to protect their privacy.
When angry or frustrated, become conscious of this and use focus and breath exercise to regain control.
Allow for more realistic amounts of free time to avoid another over-stressed blowout.
Social
Call a friend or family member every week whom I haven't talked to in a while.
Organization
Keep and follow a detailed schedule.
Keep a budget and balance all purchases.
Add to blog every evening.
Renaissance Man
Practice guitar 1 hour at least 5 times per week.
Listen to an alien album each week. (This week's is Pornography by The Cure)
Regular reading, mostly of "classics."
One-Off
Clean out closet, donating to clothing drive what I may, taking what else I can to Goodwill, and getting rid of the crap. (TUESDAY)
Take in paperwork for PTK scholarship monies. (TUESDAY)
See adviser in order to unlock registration. (THURSDAY)
Apply for Spanish immersion program next semester. (THURSDAY)
Update/adjust schedule. (MONDAY)
What's that you ask? What's the deal with the struck-out exercise and smoking? Well, they're going to continue to mess up my meta goal until I get them figured out. With the exercise I have been sacrificing that time for commuting. With the smoking I've got like half a pack and I know I'm not going to throw them out so this one will continue when the pack is gone. Still only smoking 2/3 a day, which is an improvement anyway. Those highlighted goodies are all being retired because I've been following them really easily. Hooray! Anyway, short post tonight as I want to study a bit more for my Spanish test tomorrow. o7
I am current;y housesitting in Sedona. Of course, I still have classes to attend so this means I am commuting to Flagstaff and back until the 28th when my tour of duty is up. What I didn't think about was the time out of my day I would lose! So this inherently messed up a few things, but more on that below... A thought occurred to me, that I should link the song at the top so that it may be played whilst the reader peruses. Enjoy!
META-GOAL PROGRESS No stars today. =(
- - - - - - -
CURRENT GOALS Today's busted stuff is highlighted! Physical Health
No smoking.
Exercise 5 times a week.
Vegetarian/slightly pescatarian diet.
No more than three coffees per day
No more than one soda per day. (FYI I have been lumping all sugary drinks, redbull, etc. in this category)
Vitamins daily.
Drink 2-3 liters of water daily.
7 hours of sleep nightly.
30 minutes meditation each morning.
Brush teeth every morning and night.
Behavioral
Stop being a dick to Mr. X. This person will not be identified so as to protect their privacy.
When angry or frustrated, become conscious of this and use focus and breath exercise to regain control.
Allow for more realistic amounts of free time to avoid another over-stressed blowout.
Social
Call a friend or family member every week whom I haven't talked to in a while.
Organization
Keep and follow a detailed schedule.
Keep a budget and balance all purchases.
Add to blog every evening.
Renaissance Man
Practice guitar 1 hour at least 5 times per week.
Listen to an alien album each week. (This week's is Pornography by The Cure)
Regular reading, mostly of "classics."
One-Off
Clean out closet, donating to clothing drive what I may, taking what else I can to Goodwill, and getting rid of the crap. (TUESDAY)
Take in paperwork for PTK scholarship monies. (TUESDAY)
See adviser in order to unlock registration. (THURSDAY)
Apply for Spanish immersion program next semester. (THURSDAY)
Update/adjust schedule. (MONDAY)
FOOD LOG
Granola/Kashi w/ soy milk, glass of green naked juice, cup of coffee.
Tomato basil pasta, banana.
Shrimp, ceviche w/ corn chips, dill potato salad.
Ok I'm going to lay the blame for the meditation and exercise on my housesitting situation. Ah, the schedule-following as well. I got up @ 6:30, but spent an hour taking care of the animals and then had to hit the road so I could do my reading before class. I may have been a bit lazy about the exercise... I think there is a small gym in Oak Creek so I'll probably grab a membership for the month. As for the cigarettes... I have no excuse. I got em Friday for the drive to and back from Phoenix because for me that's a non-smoking challenge on par with drinking almost. I can't bring myself to throw the remainder out, ugh, in the morning I swears it!
Guitar is going well. Instead of just trying the same song over and over (which I was quickly getting bored with) I just learned several chords (A, D, E, Em, G, C, and this weird crazy-named one) and have been making little songs to practice transferring between them. Got a strap and a capo, I really like walking around while I mess around. Seems easier to get around the guitar too.
I want to try something different. Most simply, I am going to organize this blog a little differently. Slightly less simply, I am going to start using meta-goals. What this means is I will take a certain set of goals and set a meta-goal for following them without failure. Most of the time this will be a week. I will not add new goals until I've met the meta-goal, that is, going a whole week without breaking a single goal/rule. And finally, I want to make this a bit more robust. A bit more interesting. The more I can invest myself in this tool, the better it will work for me. To this end, instead of making copy-pasta and writing for each goal, I will only comment when I break a specific goal. For the bulk of my writing I am going to do more of a journal-style entry about my day, my life, my thoughts. Also, I picked up a webcam and after I find some basic video-editing software and familiarize myself with it, I am going to start "vlogging" as well. Joy!
So as for organization, I am going to group my goals into rough categories. There are several reasons for this, chief among them my desire to advance my whole self and make sure I'm not just taking "easy" goals to keep things going. First I'll lay down all my current goals, and afterward post the new ones. Plus, I'll be retiring a goal today to the vault because I feel it is going well enough to move off of the "current" list! However this, as well as future retired goals will still be "active" in that it's something I wish to keep up and in the event it becomes an issue again will once again become active. Then to wrap it up, some thoughts and general comments.
Physical Health
No smoking.
Exercise 5 times a week.
Vegetarian/slightly pescatarian diet.
No more than three coffees per day
No more than one soda per day. (FYI I have been lumping all sugary drinks, redbull, etc. in this category)
Vitamins daily.
Drink 2-3 liters of water daily.
7 hours of sleep nightly.
30 minutes meditation each morning.
Social
Call a friend or family member every week whom I haven't talked to in a while.
Organization
Keep and follow a detailed schedule.
Keep a budget and balance all purchases.
Add to blog every evening.
Renaissance Man
Practice guitar 1 hour at least 5 times per week.
Listen to an alien album each week. (This week's is Pornography by The Cure)
*NEW GOALS* Physical Health
Brush teeth every morning and night.
Renaissance Man
Regular reading, mostly of "classics."
*NEW CATEGORIES*- Behavioral
Stop being a dick to Mr. X. This person will not be identified so as to protect their privacy.
When angry or frustrated, become conscious of this and use focus and breath exercise to regain control.
Allow for more realistic amounts of free time to avoid another over-stressed blowout.
One-Off
Clean out closet, donating to clothing drive what I may, taking what else I can to Goodwill, and getting rid of the crap. (TUESDAY)
Take in paperwork for PTK scholarship monies. (TUESDAY)
See adviser in order to unlock registration. (THURSDAY)
Apply for Spanish immersion program next semester. (THURSDAY)
Update/adjust schedule. (MONDAY)
*RETIRING*
NAIL BITING!!
Hooray for not biting nails! Although they look so juicy. My cuticles look much better but some spots are so badly damaged they still need a while to heal up. I think this is my first real success! It may not seem huge, but both unto itself and as a symbol of what I am trying to do here, I feel like it's a great milestone.
So I talked a bit in my manifesto about why I'm doing this. Well, ever since my mid-teens I feel like I have been waiting for my life to begin. It struck me recently how much time I've spent staying inside, mostly playing video games. I like games, but I don't really get any real fulfillment from them. There's quite a world out there and I've got a lot of raw potential as far as being an awesome person. But if I spend my whole life playing games... I'll put it this way. I want my death to wreck people. Yes, this probably sounds strange and selfish. The thing is, we feel the loss of the truly awesome people. Whether we know them personally or not, it's the unique individuals that touch our lives in some lasting way that we really miss. But don't get me wrong, it's not just that I want people to fucking hate it when I'm gone (although I'm sure this is probably something I want), it's just that if people fucking hate it when I'm gone then I will know that I lived something close to what I dream to be.
In my manifesto I wrote about the one thing I know I want in life; to be a good person. This is obviously an incredibly subjective thing. I don't mean I want to be a "nice" or "kind" person, though I definitely wish to be more kind than I am. "The Good" to me is living in the fullness of human potential, Of having a real lust for life and embracing what the world has to offer. I want to be the Ubermensh, or at least as close as I can get. If I can reach a point where I feel I am the best I can be, I will be happy, no matter the deficit that might remain between that and my imagined ideal. What I do know is right now, I am nowhere near this. Maybe this is the only point to life: To realize there is only us. There is no cosmic order, no hierarchy of value, no inherent meaning. I think the existentialist path is to understand this truth. Not lament it, as I mostly do, but instead to accept that we will find no answers; we must make them. Perhaps.
On a lighter note, I am going to post songs! Not always, but when it strikes me or feels appropriate. The first one comes from Mr. Lou Reed:
So a careful observer might notice it's a solid week since my last post. Well, rather than mince words about the how's and why-for's, Imma just jump right back into it.
For the remainder of this week I'll just be carrying-over the list from where I left off, with new additions coming Saturday:
Drink 4 *bottles* of water per day, starting with 1 whole liter immediately upon waking.
Ok it's come to my attention it's not actually liters, it's 4x my water bottle. XD This is closer to 2.5/3 liters. Today, I did this.
Multivitamins every morning.
No I forgot my vitamins due to being out of the routine I'm trying to establish. Got em set up for tomorrow morning where I can't miss em.
Clean out my closet. (Includes getting rid of junk and taking whatever I can to Goodwill).
Crap, forgot all about this! XD I am going to set the definitive goal to do this tomorrow after class.
Stop biting my nails/cuticles.
This one has been going really well. I haven't bit a nail or cuticle in at least 6 days. I bought a cuticle-pusher thing and an emery board to maintain them. I am such a metro!
Call a friend/family member every weekend.
No totally forgot this in the process of falling from my horse. Saturday morning Hoooo!
Listen to an alien album every week.
Yeah missed out on this one, I'll select the new one and post my choice Saturday.
Create and follow a detailed schedule.
Not too bad today.
Budget for all bills and expenses, including $50 monthly savings and $20 charitable donation. Keep a current, balanced checkbook (app).
Put the savings away, got the bills paid for this month, and a fair amount of extra income. Need to decide where the first $20 is going....
Maintain regular sleep patterns as scheduled.
Kind of messed up over the past 7 days, although I got to bed about 12:30 last night after D&D and got up with my alarm @ 8:30 this morning.
Maintain regular waking hours as scheduled.
Got up as scheduled this morning!
No more than one soda per day.
NONE
No more than three coffees.
Two cups of coffee @ home this morning
Exercise 45mins 5 times per week as scheduled.
Yes, and I kicked up the intensity. Added to the resistance level I usually use, and kept my heart rate between 148-152, spiking at 160 and never falling below 141
30 mins meditation every morning.
Blegh, totally forgot this one.
Vegetarian Diet
Despite my overall implosion, I've kept this one. Last meat I had was Saturday. Today: Brunch: vegetarian chili and a peach Jamba. Post-workout: Steamed rice and stir-fried tofu w/veg. Dinner pt. 2: 6" hummus w/ veg on wheat.
No cigarettes.
Mark stopped by and I bummed one from him. Only one today. This isn't hard until the evening, I will keep at it.
Practice guitar an hour/day. (Except Wednesday)
No, but in my defense I had some homework.
Add to this blog every evening. (Except Wednesday)
